Someone told me today that judging other people is America's new national pastime. I am in absolute agreement. We're all aiming constantly not to be "good" but to be "better than that person over there." There are infinite manifestations of this around us, but one of the more prominent ones right now is judging people who join gyms in January, also called "resolutioners."
I'm gonna break each reason I've heard down and explain why making fun of anyone who joined a gym in hopes of getting fit in 2013 is an asshole move.
1. "Ugh, my gym is so crowded now!"
Son, yo' gym was crowded before. It's really not much worse, you just think it is. Also, when you signed up for your gym there's no way they said "nah you'll be fine, machines are always free." Gyms with always-free machines close down. Your gym probs even has peak and off-peak hours because people go to the Goddamn gym. They paid to be there, so did you, and you both have equal rights to touch things. Deal with it.
2. "They're not even going to be there past February!"
Some of them will. And a huge chunk of people who sign up for gyms regardless of time of year don't return. I didn't realize that every membership given out in January is invalid if the user doesn't make it till March.
3. "Like, I don't understand why gyms let all these people sign up at once."
Seriously? TO MAKE MONEY. GYMS MAKE MONEY. They make even more on people who sign up and DON'T return, so if they are run by not-so-nice people, those people will be thrilled to take your initiation fee and then do a little joy-dance in their office if they think you're never coming back. Decent places want you to feel good, but all places need to make money and barring some fight in the yoga studio because someone's elbow was in someone's face because they fit 80 people in a 20 person room, they're gonna continue to sign people up.
4. "*some comment about how you can 'always tell' who's there as part of a New Year's Resolution*"
You're calling them fat, we get it, and you're a terrible person. When you aren't skinny, it's freaking hard enough to get up the courage to sign up for a membership, and then you have to worry about everyone else there judging you and hoping you disappear because your fat ass is taking up space on an elliptical that you apparently inherited and have complete rights to? I've been there, okay? I'm still not skinny and I don't know if I ever will be, but when you gave me some dirty look because my size 14 ass was on a spin bike in the back of class (to which I arrived 25 minutes early to set up my bike and hide in the back row) I feel even more shame than society in general makes me feel for being chubby and this makes it less likely that I'll change. Not that this happened to me or anything. Grrr.
5. "They never even know how to use the equipment!"
There are PLENTY of decade-long gym goers who don't know shit, too. I've seen ladies and dudes run like 8 miles on a treadmill, sweat all the hell over it, and not wipe it down. I see plenty of GTL-ing-esque dudebros screwing up lat pull-downs or whatever and clanging machines and dropping weights or whatever else you're pissed about them not knowing. There are regulars in every spin class I've been to who come in late, hang out in the front row, don't follow the instructor's directions, leave early, and don't wipe down the bike. I have no proof on this, but I'd be willing to bet money that new people are actually more courteous about gym etiquette than regulars are. Because the regulars don't get judged like the new people.
6. "Blah blah first world problems blah blah"
Whatever other reason you can come up with, just shut up. Seriously. You're being mean and rude and unhelpful and judgmental and just awful. Stop it.
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